Can I just be real here? THIS is my pic from Super Saturday today (which, by the way…was AWESOME!). I had a great workout (this is the after shot) But this. I’ve lost 60 pounds on my journey so far, and I’m not discrediting that in any way – because I’ve worked my butt off for each of those 60 pounds! But I see this pic and I’m like…where’s my progress? While 99% of the time I am confident with the person I have become, the inner fatty in me still struggles. And I don’t even like to call myself a fatty…not even my style. I guess this is all just to say…sometimes, the inner workings to creating a new self is just as much of a challenge as the outer workings. Both have to work together at the same time.
So here are some of my confessions that I have either celebrated or had to deal with as a result of this journey:
1. Clothing. Sixty pounds later, my wardrobe is changing. It HAS to – none of my old clothes fit any longer! For the first time ever, I can walk into any store in the mall and try on just about whatever I want without worrying about squeezing into it and hoping the item will zip. I knew the exact styles that would be flattering to my figure, so shopping was fairly easy. Having new options completely overwhelms me. Whereas before I bought anything that fit and looked decently on me, now I’m to the point where my level of options has MULTIPLIED. I didn’t have much of a fashion sense before (plus size clothing is not always fashion forward), and now I’m in trouble! However, wearing mediums and larges are a very welcome reward.
2. Body Image. I LOVE how I look in my new clothes. I feel good in my skin. I haven’t finished my weight loss journey, but I’m very proud of where I have gotten to. However, there are some days when I look down at myself and still see the 254 pound person. It takes a moment before I realize I am not that same girl. I can fit into places that used to be a tight squeeze. Airplanes? I used to turn sideways and suck it in, so make sure I never bumped into anyone. Yep. Now it’s no longer an issue (except for the occasional clumsiness). Roller coasters? I no longer have to worry.
3. Health. I FEEL amazing. I now have a new energy that was not there before. Eating poor foods will actually put my body into a little shock. Physically I can do things that took effort before. Playing with my toddlers is FUN, and I love the fact that I can easily keep up with them. As a coach, I have high standards for myself, because I don’t want to let my team down. Even when I get together with other coaches for workouts, I push myself harder because I don’t want to let my fellow coaches down. I’m not to a level of 100% fit YET, but each day my goal is to be closer than I was yesterday.
4. Internal matters. When I first joined Beachbody my first challenge group, the first piece of new advice was personal development. Honestly, I thought that was a little hokey at first. I don’t read. I’m a toddler mom on the go and who has time for that? But I found ways to stream books and podcasts to listen while I’m in the car. It’s made an incredible difference! It has given me time to focus on ME becoming a better person not only for myself, but for my husband and family as well. It has helped support me on my journey to not only giving me a healthy mindset (beyond the fitness and nutrition), but helped me to build and grow my business as well.
5. Other random confessions. I still adore chocolate. It is now a “sometimes on occasion make it the good stuff though” food. Except for Shakeology. Don’t touch my chocolate Shakeology! There are many other “sometimes on occasion make it the good stuff though” foods in my life. However, I have found that clean eating CAN be delicious and fun. But if I’m going to stray, then the calories have to be worth it.
If you read this far, thanks for hearing me out. I’d like to hear from you. Can you relate to any of these confessions? Whether you have already been down this road, or are waiting to start your journey, I want to hear from you. Find me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/funbetty) and send me a message.